


Not A Picture Perfect Morning

by lonlygnome



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Divorce, F/M, drinking issues, general all around fuckin pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-02
Updated: 2013-11-02
Packaged: 2017-12-31 05:54:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1028051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lonlygnome/pseuds/lonlygnome
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leonard remembers it all a bit too well.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not A Picture Perfect Morning

**Author's Note:**

> Don't own Trek.
> 
> I haven't written much for this muse, so any commentary would be much appreciated.

"I’m taking Jo with me."

"You can’t! She’s just as much my daughter as she is yours!"

He remembers the way the door slammed, the way the engine groaned as it got taken out of the drive, the way Jo looked as her mother carried her out of the house. There’s a lot to remember about that night, and for some reason he can remember every god damn detail of it.

He remembers trying so hard not to get wasted. To ignore the bottle he’d stashed away because he knew that’s what this was about. And maybe if he could be clean she’d come back. She’d changer her mind.

He remembers the pure disappointment at himself when he suddenly had the bottle in his hand minus a few glasses. He didn’t know what else to do asides from try and forget. Forget that it had happened and pray she’d be back in the morning, acting as though none of this had happened.

He remembers the pain of his finger nails digging into his forehead when the bottle was gone. Guilt hitting him that he couldn’t control it. Remembers thinking maybe this was for the best. Knowing that it wasn’t right for a girl not to have her father.

He remembers it all. The way the cool air knocked the breath out of him when he stepped outside the next night and Jocelyn still wasn’t there. The way the text turned into plain black lines when the legal envelope appeared on the steps a few days later. The way Joce gave him a cold shoulder and wouldn’t let him near enough to Jo to say goodbye when she finally showed up with lawyers.

Maybe what he remembers most is the look his grandmother gave him when he showed up on her doorstep. Bleary eyed with a bag thrown over his shoulder and one in his hands it was pretty damn clear what had happened. He remembers it, and isn’t sure if the disappointment or pity is worse.

Usually now he’s too busy for it to hit him. For him to remember that he’s well and truly thrown out of his daughters life. Then there are the days where almost nothing happens. Days when half the crew decides to act like kids and throw pranks, run about, cause chaos. All he can do is sit there and patch them up as they come in. Maybe they don’t come in crying but its pretty damn close.

So maybe most of them think he’s a grump, assume he’s really as cold as he puts out. How the how else is he supposed to cope? It’s not like he can stay comfortably drunk. He kicked that tendency with Kirk in Academy. He’s got to tamper down that ache though, the one begging him to cause some chaos of his own with his little girl.

Yes he remembers, and he tries as hard as hell to act as though it’s nothing when two younger people come in giggling over what they just pulled off as the nurses treat their minor injuries. If he hits the bottle a little harder then usual after shift, it’s not like there’s anyone there to notice.


End file.
